terça-feira, 11 de abril de 2017

Can we honestly not mind?

Hello,
These days here in Brazil we're facing a national scandal of sexual harassment. One of our most famous actors was accused of steady abuse on a wardrobe specialist that escalated from 'How cute you are' to 'grab'em by their p**y', literally.



She was a minor worker on our bigger and better TV stations, he is top ten actor material, she's on her twenties, he's nearing 70. Couldn't be more cliche. 
After she gave a very poignant interview to a newspaper TV column, the personnel department had to make the gigantic TV station take measures, and only after that other women reported similar circumstances with that guy - even famous actresses. 
Aside the indignation of the case, the common place of it all, I find myself asking why didn't any of them report earlier?
Can we women overlook some dirty look or snigger? Do we see things in different layers? Of course, I guess. 



Everyday we are subjected to contact with the opposite sex, not all is friendly - and not particularly hostile either. Something I don't appreciate is enough to be labeled harassment?
Don't get me wrong, I abhore such things and have complained vocally more than once when I see, feel or hear an 'attack', but risking sounding chovinist, some things are just stupid. Not necessarily haressing.
In books, if the guy grabs the girl by her arm, squeezes her butt and thrust his tongue in her mouth as she says 'oh, John, we better not' we swoon. There's context, we seem to know the attacker and so we feel free to overlook the victim's will. In a way, we are culprits too.
It's a double standard, men have to be sexually aggressive but even as we appreciate (and expect) such behavior, socially we say we don't accept it.
There's always 50 shades that comes from Twilight that in some other dimension came from Pride and Prejudice. The crappy and creepy guy had a violent taste for sex and a lot of cash to make his willing victims fancy themselves in love with that life (let me not start here, I've already blogged quite elegantly about I felt about it). Then, a sparkling vamp was both father figure and supposed lover to a girl 80years his junior and -me included- thought it exhilarating to have him invading her bedroom every night. Then, my dear lovely imperfectly perfect gentleman proposing marriage by saying 'your inferiority is shameful'. 
'These are only books, Moira.' You may be rolling your eyes.
'Yeah, sure. I do right awfully chauvinist lines for my heroes sometimes.' Shame on me. 'But books reflect the age they were created.' 


Austen was 19th century. What's our excuse?
*sigh*